As most young women, I had a lot of ideas about being married that were just that…ideas. The reality of being married and the responsibility that comes along with that, especially when living for God, is another thing. Most young girls have grandeur visions, a Cinderella type story, of married life. But that is the reason it’s called a ‘fairytale.’ I’m not saying two people can’t share a beautiful life, not at all, but its not all a bed of roses and champagne. When two people share their lives and are living under the same roof, it is a whole other world. Being I was young and inexperienced I had a lot to learn about myself, my human nature, love, compassion, understanding, patience…the list goes on….and on….and on. I had to learn how to become a godly wife and honor my husband. What does that even mean and what did God expect of me? I would soon find out. It is one thing to love someone with human love but to love someone with God’s love - that is a love that is learned over time. As my father used to say, ‘Human love runs out - God’s love is never ending.’
The first year of our marriage was challenging. We both were pretty independent and had lived very different lives and were trying to mesh those two lives into one home now. There was a lot of compromise necessary and I am not sure we always knew what that meant and what was involved. Funny thing is…most of the things we disagreed on were so small and insignificant. Yet, we were two people trying to live together for the first time. Not to mention being male and female. That’s a whole other thing in itself. So interesting the way God designed us for different purposes, yet, to come together as two parts and make one whole. My husband was generally laid back and easy going but when I moved in and brought all my stuff and all my ideas - about what should go where - he simply didn’t understand it and thought things were good as they were. I, of course, thought my ideas were brilliant and worked so beautifully that I couldn’t understand...how he couldn’t understand. I must say human reasoning runs out as well, thank goodness God’s wisdom is infinite. Because God was the foundation of our marriage, we worked at it and implemented God’s Ways into the challenges we faced. We utilized His wisdom and learned how to continually overcome our human natures and put each other’s needs first (Romans 12:21, Phillipians 2:3). God’s love prevailed and so did we.
We were living in his apartment and we made the most of it, even though it was teeny tiny. We knew we would most likely need a bigger place, but for that first year we had fun having friends and family over. We all squished in and made it work, no matter what the occasion. My parents and grandma had returned to Minnesota a couple weeks after the wedding. When they came back the next winter my mom helped me look for a new place for us. She had wished that we could find something with extra bedrooms so they could possibly stay with us. They had grown weary of the motorhome life and with everyone getting older it was more challenging. Especially my Grams and her failing health. She had a walker and couldn’t use it in the motorhome to get around. My mom and I had prayed together about a place and I wasn’t sure what was in store to be honest. But, as God would have it he brought about the most ideal place possible. We found a home for rent just a few blocks away. It was in a lovely neighborhood, old and historic. Alot of the original homeowners still lived there and took great care of their property. This house was a three bedroom, with a lovely and spacious backyard and a 2 car detached garage. It had a living room with a big picture window and a fireplace. It was cozy and welcoming. My mom loved it too and could envision all of us there. If they could stay with us in the winter, they could store the motorhome at the house instead of having to put it in a storage facility. It would save them money and everyone would be so much more comfortable. When I talked it over with my husband, he loved the idea and thought it would be great. So we rented it!
We had so much fun in the new place and it was a riot having my parents and grams stay with us. My husband and I both worked full-time jobs so my parents had the place to themselves during the day and at night, when we would come home, my Mom and Grams would have something brewing for dinner. It really made the house a home. They would stay with us four months out of the year from about Thanksgiving to April. Some nights, my Dad would play his guitar, my Mom would play the piano and sing and we would all sort of have a jam session - my husband playing guitar too and I would be on the flute, vocals or keyboard. During the week my Dad would be studying his Bible and writing articles, as he always had while I was growing up, or preparing for his next sermon. The young man that had come into the Bible study, in the very beginning there, had become his closest friend and sort of an intern if you will. He spent tons of time with my Dad, having in-depth and interesting conversations about the Bible. He had been living for God for several years now and was leading the Bible study my father started there when he was away. He lived just down the street from our new house so it was super convenient for all the time they spent together. My Grams would sit on the front porch and would crochet most days of the week, or by the kitchen table with a cup of tea. My Mom took care of everything else and would be writing songs, poems and articles to contribute to their ministry and monthly biblical newsletter publication. My father had found that over the years, he met so many people in his travels and spoke to them about God’s Ways and they always wanted to learn more. A newsletter became the easiest way to continue to help them learn from coast to coast and eventually worldwide. This was a big endeavor but he fully immersed himself in it and it became a real passion project for him and my mother. It was a way their ministry could touch people all over the world. At that time there was no internet so everything was still snail mail. They poured their heart into the newsletter, not realizing it would end up becoming the cornerstone of their ministry.
Our new home was serving many purposes and was a blessing to not only us, but many others. It was a special place for family first and foremost. We held Thanksgiving, New Years Eve, tea parties, birthday parties and hosted many friends and family from all over the country that came to visit. There was one special little girl, in particular, that became a part of my life when I married my husband, who spent summers with us. This was, yet, another part of my marriage I was not prepared for…
♥️LGOF