Now that I was more free to be me, I couldn’t wait to see my best friend at home and tell her about my adventures and all that had changed. Funny thing was, the kids at my Minnesota high school seemed glad to see me and started treating me differently. All of the sudden, they were interested in me because they wanted to know all about California. I came back tan, with blonde streaks in my light brown hair from all the sun and pool time, not to mention more confident. Some of the popular kids started talking to me and I casually hung out with them - even though I wasn’t into what they were. Most of them were in sports, and other extra curricular activities, but I wasn’t being the way I was raised. None of my friends ever talked about their faith or religion and that was the most important thing in my life. I just didn’t have a ton in common with them. I didn’t got to parties and didn’t really hang out with my friends outside of school. I didn’t have a huge desire for that. I knew they were doing things God didn’t want me to do and getting into trouble - I heard plenty of stories - I was trying to live a godly life and that was not interesting to them, so again, I compartmentalized my life. I was just happy to have friends in school and feel more accepted now. After my experiences in California, high school started to feel like a holding pen - keeping me from the rest of my life. I was so over school, and the urgency to get on with my life increased quickly. I felt more connections with my teachers than my peers at this point. I felt like I had outgrown high school. My father once told me he had the same experience when he was in high school; he too was friends with his teachers and not his peers. One of the many ways, I would find, I was like him.
Then…in an instant...my world was jarred dramatically...my best friend from childhood was taken from me in one startling and swift moment. Her father had decided to go his own way and they were no longer a part of our Bible Study group. Just like that...I wouldn’t see her again. I was ripped from her arms in tears, sobbing. She meant everything to me….she was the only best friend I ever had. How could I go on without her. We had grown so close. I loved her so deeply. Sobbing, I got into the car and as we drove away I felt this terrible pain in my chest. It felt like a ripping sensation and a stabbing sensation all at once. It hurt so badly. It was hard to breathe. I had never felt anything like it before. My heart was literally breaking. It was the first time in my life I was tragically torn from someone that I loved. It hurt more than I knew you could hurt. It was a deeper pain than I had ever experienced and it was so sudden. There was nothing I could do about it. I was helpless. I couldn’t call her, I couldn’t write…it was just - over. I would suffer for a long time after that. I didn’t know love could hurt like this. I didn’t know this pain before now. I didn’t realize how long it would last. I would dream about her and her family on a regular basis for many years to come. There was no closure….it was an open wound. A love lost so suddenly and without warning. It would be the first of many.
California was the best diversion I had for my loss. It was an escape for my sadness and pain. It was a salve for my gaping wound. God had brought a couple people to my father, and he was helping a young man and a young lady, whom he met at a local group. They both loved God and had been to many churches and Bible Study groups over the years, but had not found the key of knowledge that unlocked their hearts and minds to understanding the Bible. He was teaching them about the Bible and sharing what God had shown him. It was a message that truly changed lives, and not in the traditional church way. Matter of fact, the message he preached was not being taught in churches. It was more than just believing and was actually a way of life. It was exciting to see his vision become a reality, of God calling people in California. The young man was very eager to learn and had graduated from a Christian college, with a degree in religion. He was planning on attending seminary school, so knew a lot about the Bible already, but still didn’t have the in—depth understanding my father did. They spent many hours in the Bible together. I had never seen anyone so devoted and dedicated to learning as he was. He also showed us around San Diego more, being he lived there, and he made us feel more at home. He introduced my sister and I to “ fish tacos” which we thought would be disgusting and they ended up being one of my favorite things! Not only did he love God, and was intent on learning more, but he was fun too. He brought a new kind of energy and life to our motorhome. The young lady did too, she was very spirited and childlike. She was so excited to learn from my father and she became close to both my sister and I. She was older than us, and had a car. She too lived in San Diego for many years, so knew the place well. She took us around and it changed our time there in a big way. She was our new friend and she loved God so much! It was fantastic. We had a blast with both of them and spent a lot of time together. They were the beginning of a new Bible Study in San Diego.
I also met a boy, who was vacationing with his family at the RV resort. He was a couple years older than me and had a younger brother who was my little sisters age. They were both good looking. The boy my age seemed interested in me…it was the first time I was pursued. He ended up being my first kiss. I hate to tell you I don’t remember it - at all. After that he tried to push me to do more than that and it was over before it really began. I wasn’t interested in more than that. I was raised to save myself for marriage and that was a commitment I planned on keeping, to honor God . My father had taught me from Hebrews 13:4: Marriage is to be held in honor among all, and the marriage bed is to be undefiled; for fornicators and adulterers God will judge. Any guy after, that would try to push me too far...I would end it. Some said they respected me for my beliefs, but still pushed me anyway. I could tell they weren’t sincere and just wanted what they wanted. Many of them were passing through the RV resort because they were visiting on vacation or knew someone there. I had a few very short relationships but they all ended for the same reason. I wasn’t going to give it up. I won’t say I wasn’t tempted, but God was too important to me and it was equally important to honor my father and mother. Deuteronomy 5:16: Honor your father and mother, as the Lord your God has commanded you, that your days may be prolonged and that it may go well with you on the land which the Lord your God gives you.
After being disheartened by this merry-go-round of boys, who didn’t really want to know me - just wanted to use me - I became very frustrated. One night, while laying in bed and thinking about it all, I put up a prayer to God...
God, I really desire to have a friend, a guy friend. Someone that can make me laugh and I can have fun with, someone that will respect me and my beliefs, someone that wants to know me and is interested in me, as a person...someone that can love you the way I love you….
As I prayed, I realized that if I found this guy, he would be pretty perfect. All of the sudden I prayed…
If he has to be my husband….then that would be okay I guess…..Amen.
I was kind of stunned I said it. That was not my plan…to get married. I was going to have a career, get my own place…join the corporate world. But I said it. It was done. There it was. I knew if I met a man that wonderful, I would never want to let him go. I was too young to be getting married so I thought, well….God knows what He’s doing.
Within a week or two of that prayer, someone came into my life unexpectedly. Someone really different from anyone I had ever met. Someone that would change my life…and show me more of the many facets of love.
♥️LGOF